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sixty-three things tagged “hollywood movies

Asteroid City

Tidy, as usual when it comes to his movies, but total rubbish. I imagine that I would get this shit if I guided ChatGPT to generate a parody of his most indulgent excesses. Meat for the most hardcore of his fans and a (meticulous) waste of the sheer amount of talent involved. How this has a 75% on R…

Rating: C-
Solace

Solace

(2015)

Decent background-watch. Whoever did the ‘visions’ knocked it out of the park. A waste of Anthony Hopkins and Colin Farrell, who play clairvoyants whose powers wax and wane in service of the utterly predictable plot. Like Next1 but slightly better. Which is a fantastic fucking movie if you love Mr.…

Rating: C-
House of Gucci

Tedious “I can make longass movies like Marty too!” stuff from Ridley Scott. Fascinating and tragic story in real life though. Adam Driver is reserved. Lady Gaga is outstanding. Jared Leto is a fucking clown and is either trying too hard or doesn’t give a shit anymore. Al Pacino is in this movie as…

Rating: B-
Clean

Clean

(2022)

Adrien Brody is a great actor and I love watching him act. I absolutely love good, easy revenge flicks. So this was an easy pick. Mr. Brody channels his inner Travis Bickle (for the most part.) This was Taxi Driver meets Taken meets John Wick, and there’s nothing wrong with that. Brody produced, wro…

Rating: B-
The Matrix Resurrections

Saw with LD on Christmas Eve. I thought it was well-done millennial nostalgia porn. Nothing wrong with that. I loved the humor and digs at techbro culture and co-option of “red-pill” by the far-right (which led to my favorite set of Tweets.) Thought it could be a deconstruction of the original Matri…

Rating: B+
Candyman

Candyman

(2021)

Saw with BE and NN. Eh. Clear messages about creatives’ struggles and temptations, and the importance of continuing to tell past and present stories of horrific pain and suffering. I suppose I just lazily wanted to watch a well-made scary movie without actively engaging with it, without searching fo…

Rating: B+
I See You

I See You

(2019)

Academy Award-winning Helen Hunt is a pharma-stunned alien who doesn’t enjoy any screentime in a disjointed plot that prioritizes misdirection over coherence. Great cinematography. I loved the background score by William Arcane.…

Rating: B-
Election

Election

(1999)

One of the best black comedies I’ve seen. Amazing attention to detail. Watched with LD. Reese Witherspoon was just perfect. Indeed, it was a breakthrough role for which she won a bunch of awards. Learned that Jessica Campbell who was also perfect as the angsty Tammy Metzler sadly passed away in Janu…

Rating: A
Homefront

Homefront

(2013)

Shit. Stallone wrote it. Background-watched because it looked revenge-y and Netflix listed it as a Top 10 movie in the US. Jason Statham is B+ as Jason Statham. This time, he growl-mumbles through this shit movie as an undercover DEA agent (with Special Forces training of course) who speaks with an…

Rating: D
Shadow of a Doubt

Watched with CK. This was Hitchcock’s favorite movie: This was my father’s favourite movie, and it was because he loved bringing the menace into a small town1, into a family that had never known any bad things happen to them. They adored this uncle. They just adored him. Yet they had no idea what h…

Rating: A
Tenet

Tenet

(2020)

Watched with CK. The plot doesn’t make any sense whatsoever. But very, very entertaining. Anyone who claims to understand what’s going on after the first 32 viewings is a damned liar. A perfect one-line review: So suit up […] for what may not be Nolan at his best, but is definitely Nolan at his mo…

Rating: B
Dream Team

Michael Keaton and Christopher Lloyd were excellent. But Peter Boyle steals the show as “Jack McDermott. Christ fixation. Megalomania.” BILLY Hey, Doc, isn’t it true that if even one of those tiles were to come loose, millions and millions of gallons of water would come pouring down on us and squas…

Rating: B+
The Rhythm Section

Am a sucker for a good revenge story. This one was very slow and kinda haphazard. But I didn’t think it was bad enough to deserve this: The film received negative reviews from critics and was a box-office bomb, having the worst wide opening weekend of all-time, the biggest drop in theaters, and is…

Rating: C+
The Foreigner

Ireland. Liam. Mick. Belfast. Mary. IRA. Patrick. Belfast. Liam Hennessy. Sean. Sinn Féin. “You should try a real whiskey. Two Jamesons, Single Malt.” Belfast. Belfast. Also Jackie Chan. But watch for Orla Brady 🇮🇪…

Rating: C
There Will Be Blood

Finally saw this with PLG. Daniel Day-Lewis’ best performance IMO. Astounding, really. Mr. Day-Lewis’s outsize performance, with its footnote references to Huston and strange, contorted Kabuki-like grimaces, occasionally breaks the skin of the film’s surface like a dangerous undertow. The actor see…

Rating: A+
The Irishman

The last 15 minutes are the best depiction of old age, loneliness, and isolation I’ve ever seen committed to film. Two masters at their very best. I love all the memes about its length but (a) the pacing was brilliant and (b) I am someone who grew up watching 200-minute family-values extravaganzas a…

Rating: A
Us

Us

(2019)

Excellent stuff again from Jordan Peele. Thought the first half was about slavery and lost identity. Wisecrack has a great video on the movie’s various interpretations. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SDMgFplACaQ…

Rating: A
A Vigilante

The first two-thirds are brilliant. As for Olivia Wilde and her riveting performance: [. . .] it’s still good to see a cunning and capable actress rise above her usual projects, such as stupid fodder like Tron or Cowboys and Aliens, or labels like “Sexiest Vegetarian Celebrity of 2010.” After Enoug…

Rating: B+
Aquaman

Aquaman

(2019)

Fell asleep about three times trying to finish this visual overload. Ended up taking a walk right after this exchange “You expect me to call you Your Highness?” “No, I expect you to call me… Ocean Master.”…

Rating: C+
Crazy Rich Asians

I don’t understand the ratings and the hullabaloo over what was affluence porn with a tired Bollywood plot (Kabhi Khushi Kabhie Gham came to mind but I’m sure there’s something else that aligns better with CRA.) Might be a satirical, over-the-top take on new and old money in Singapore, though I wond…

Rating: C
Bird Box

Bird Box

(2018)

A slasher version of A Quiet Place except The Monster gets you when you open your eyes (but only at key moments that further the plot.) Snoozefest after the first half. Had no idea that the lanky, highly tattooed extra is a famous rapper. A few plotholes that bugged me: What exactly constitutes a s…

Rating: B-
Venom

Venom

(2018)

Venom goes from evil alien mastermind who wants to take over the planet to Toothless in “How to Train Your Dragon” in about five minutes. His new motivations make no sense whatsoever. But in the case of Venom, the action follows nothing. There’s no reason for Venom to risk his life because he does…

Rating: C+
Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

Dan Fogler is as awesome in this one as he was in the first. A role he was born to play: Did you feel like you had an advantage while auditioning because you’re actually from New York? I think I brought some real authenticity to it. I grew up in Brooklyn. When I read the part, I thought, “Oh, man,…

Rating: A-

Lutz Ebersdorf

As if I needed another reason to fall in love with Tilda Swinton Swinton penned a phony IMDb biography to keep the secret, and wore fake genitalia, created by makeup artist Mark Coulier, while in character. (“She did have us make a penis and balls,” Coulier told the paper. “She had this nice, weigh…

Hereditary

Deeply upsetting. One of the best horror movies I’ve ever seen. Anthony Lane of The New Yorker on what gives it its potency Should you want to measure the psychological disturbance at work here, try comparing “Hereditary” with “A Quiet Place.” That recent hit, for all its masterly shocks, is at bot…

Rating: A
Sicario: Day of the Soldado

This is the jingoistic view of American force so familiar from films like ‘Black Hawk Down.’ This is American power as an unstoppable beast. Yep. You would be forgiven for asking what religious extremists have to do with a film series that previously focused on Mexican drug cartels. You would als…

Rating: B+
Isle of Dogs

Michael Cavna at The Washington Post with a roundup of the cultural appropriation controversy around the movie. Steve Rose at The Guardian: Some critics are barking “appropriation!” on Twitter and online, but where Ghost in the Shell and Doctor Strange (and there are many more) took a Japanese stor…

Rating: A-

Relativity

The 1.25s interval between each ‘tick’ in the background score of the water planet scenes1 in “Interstellar” indicates the passage of a single day on Earth. #theydidthemath See also: thalassophobia↩︎…

Game Night

Jesse Plemons steals the show even though he has very little screen time. In my book, he is no longer Todd from Breaking Bad, and is never to be referred to as “Meth Damon” or “Discount Matt Damon”…

Rating: B+